Doc’s Corner: Is Your Marriage a Covenant or a Contract?
A contract is a legal agreement that may be broken. A covenant is to never be broken, as it is a binding agreement, to love unconditionally and sacrificially to the end of one’s earthly life. A covenant vow is a covenant promise, foundational to a covenant marriage. A covenant marriage is the unique one-flesh relationship of a man and woman joined together by God in a union that He wills to be both permanent and exclusive, binding the couple to each other in a life-long companionship of common life and sacrificial love. Your covenant vows and marriage are not meant to be broken. They are a promise of a lifetime.
Vital Signs of a Covenant Love
· Covenant love is a sacrificial love. There is a cost for covenant love– the giving of our lives.
“This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins. Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another.” 1 John 4:10-11
· Covenant love is a love full of tender mercy, grace and forgiveness. It is where you are loved unconditionally and where you can count on that love even when you least deserve it!
“Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me? Up to seven times?” Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.” Matthew 18:21-23
· Covenant love is a love that serves one another. Couples are mutually committed to each other. It is not a 50/50 deal, but it is each giving 100 percent.
“Just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.” Matthew 20:28
· Covenant love is a love of choice. It is choosing to love and not relying solely on our feelings of love.
“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails” 1 Corinthians 13:4-8.
· Covenant love is a love of restoration. Couples are committed to resolving hostility, and to work things out among themselves. Couples are restless when they realize something is wrong between them. They seek reconciliation with God and strive to be reconciled and restored to each another.
“Therefore each of you must put off falsehood and speak truthfully to his neighbor, for we are all members of one body. In your anger do not sin. Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold.” Ephesians 4:25-27
· Covenant love is a love of being the best friends for life!
“The LORD God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him. Then the LORD God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man. The man said, “This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called ‘woman,’ for she was taken out of man.” For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh.” Genesis 1:18; 22-24
How do you see your relationship contractual or covenant?
How is this displayed?
What can you do to get it your relationship more covenant?